Sun, soon enough

Why is it monsoon season in January?

I mean rain is nice and all, but I'd like to make it to my destination without muddy feet and my umbrella coming apart every time thank you very much.

Also, please excuse my brief disappearance from the blog world. On top of school - speaking of which, I am almost done with the year: Just one more submission to go! - I had been engaging in some battles...

Battles going on in my mind, that is.

I'd like to think that I have come a long way into recovery. I am not recovered yet, but I am getting there. I have bad days, but the days that I feel great definitely outweigh them.

Honestly, I am always pretty reluctant to blog about the days I feel off or whenever my mood plummets (hence the silence) because I like to keep things positive around these parts... Mostly for myself. 

But then I realised...

I am going to get through all of this in the end... and soon. So why shouldn't I talk about my bad days on my blog as well?

Heck, a few days back I was feeling so shit - I was burnt out from my workouts, I had more than one insatiable appetite day, I was bloated and uncomfortable, and irritable and moody. Things have cleared up now - nothing a week off couldn't fix, but those few days were definitely dreadful.

But you know what? Tough times don't last. Tough people do.

I was never a tough person - I had things so easy in my life. Until my ED came I used to take everything for granted. I could never see past how my friends used me, I never saw how I was killing myself with obesity (At first. And then anorexia. Ha). When my ED hit I didn't even know what I was going through. I thought everything was normal. Yeaaaah no - but that's a story for another post.

Point is that this thing has made me stronger. It's a hard climb, but I've already made it so far up, it's just that final push now. And when I do get out of all this... Well I'm gonna have a hell of a story right there. Soon enough this will be something I will look at in the future and tell to my children.

So here I go... I am not proofreading this rant, and I am just gonna hit on publish.

Hitting on publish so my future self can be proud of herself in this moment. Hitting on publish because I made the right decision. Hitting on publish to never ever regret anything because everything happens for a reason.

And before I go... I know it's late and all... But would you accept these Valentines day cookies I made?

Thank you for making up to this point if you did.

See you lovely ladies on Wednesday - it's gonna be my last WIAW from Singapore (for a month, at least)... Because I'm flying to Melbourne on Sunday! EeeEeeEEeeyyyyaaayy!